This whole year or more has been a blur. A blur of exhaustion, over time, dashed hopes and lost job opportunities for both Jason and I. It has been like rock climbing until you realize the rock you are using as a hand hold, isn’t attached to anything.
There is so much comfort in familiarity; we are talking about loosing all familiarity. I have two options; try to keep what we have and loose even more time with my son and it still may not be enough in the long run, or give up everything we have and try to make it better in the future? Hmmmmmmm…. But it is still scary, sad and feels like a defeating waste. I want to scream, break down, QUIT! But I can’t.
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